-You idiot, MLS!
How could you just let David Beckham get away with that? You owned his rights, had him under contract for another three years, and you blew it! You just go ahead and let him stay at A.C. Milan beyond his March 9th curfew? What were you thinking? 0101010101!!!
For God sakes, MLS, I wished you had used your cojones.* The worst part of this whole fiasco isn’t that Becks got exactly what he wanted, short of Rebecca Loos and her skanky drawers. The worst part was that the League sat back and was pushed around worse than wuss Fredo Corleone. MLS, you got served.
(*Props to Texas Soccer Republic for the clarification.)
The worst part is that this situation sets a horrible precedent for any other international star wishing to play in MLS. No need to honor your contract. We’ll simply loan you out to the club of your choice once you lose interest. If you like it there, by all means, stay for the remainder of the season. Don’t worry about us. We’ll anxiously await your return.
MLS = Major League Sissies.
-R.I.P. The Beckham Four Pack, 2007-2008, the only way I could convince hot chicks to come with me to a soccer game
-The New England Revolution won’t play a single MLS opponent this preseason. And I feel fine.
-Speaking of the Revs, reports are that Steve Nicol’s got his eyes on a couple of African defenders to help shore up what may be a four man backline given Michael Parkhurst’s departure.
-Memo to the Chicago Fire: don’t loan out Cuauhtemoc Blanco. Ever.
-Speaking of the Fire, Chicago looks like it's ripping pages right out of the A.C. Milan textbook on how to put together an all-geriatric XI. I know nursing homes are big business, but c'mon, this is professional soccer dammit!
-Now all they need to do is pirate an aging, modelesque midfielder. I wonder what Giorgio Chinaglia's doing right now....
-As troubling as it’s been to see the Beckham fiasco blow up in MLS’s face, the league’s got to breathing an enormous sigh of relief in knowing that its oh-so-flamboyant media gadfly, Landon Donovan, will be back.
-By the way, L.A. will be much, much better this season, with or without Becks. Aside from flying charter, of course.
-Their interstadium rivals, Chivas USA, will contend it can stay healthy, which is no easy task given that half the league's defenders still resort to flailing no-ball tackles.
-Healthy or not, Houston will struggle without D-Ro, and they should, because you just don't let a guy like that go unless he's got bad pics of your wife/girlfriend/friend with benefits.
-Apparently, it’s down to Vancouver and Portland for the latest round of expansion, with Barca backing out of Miami and St. Louis still struggling to propose a serious bid. The after-effects of the Beckham Saga supposedly left Barca kinda squeamish about Miami. So thank you Becks, I owe you an enormous amount of gratitude for keeping MLS out of Miami, thereby depriving me an opportunity to head down to South Beach on a "professional" basis in the near future.
-By the way, it’s a travesty that St. Louis, a historical soccer hotbed, still does not have an MLS club of its own in 2009. I don't know how much longer the soccer gods' patience can be tested.
-Oh yeah, you spring’s just around the corner when Revolution radio spots start creeping in between me lip-synching Lady Gaga and Britney Spears.*
(*Holy crap, did I just publish that out loud?)
-Here’s hoping that Taylor Twellman is A-OK, even if it means he has to hang up the boots in the wake of several concussions.
-When Steve Ralston retires – which may or may not occurr until one of those flying cars in Back to the Future Part II appear in the vicinity of a Revolution soccer spec stadium* – his boots should be immediately bronzed like my baby shoes.
(*I should have said "when a Teletubby becomes President," but then I realized that's a lot more likely to happen than the conditions set forth above.)
-D.C United will rebound this season. Kansas City won’t.
-Real Salt Lake is quietly putting together a club that will contend for years, a thought that seemed all but improbable only less 18 months ago. This just proves that everything that happens in a market like Salt Lake City is done quietly.
-Do MLS clubs really care about CONCACAF Champions League?
-And does CCL provide the strongest argument for promotion/relegation in MLS?
-Quiz of the Week: Which original Boston Breaker recently signed on with the Breakers this past week?
-I don’t know why, but I miss Dave O’Brien calling MLS matches. Same with Eric Wynalda.
-I also miss Brandi Chastain on the sidelines. But for different reasons...
-Kudos to the Revs for introducing the economically-friendly $200 season ticket for a seat in The Fort, even if the phrase “a seat in The Fort” is a misnomer.
-If there’s one positive about the whole Beckham drama, it’s that it makes me even itchier than Lindsay Lohan for actual MLS on-the-pitch action.
-Well, that and not having to hear me talk about it anymore.
-The Carolina Challenge Cup tournament is exactly what MLS needs more of to intensify its bland, Nilla Wafer-like preseason.
-I’ll probably say it again, but I will miss the Reserve League, a wonderful forum for kids and families to watch professional soccer not only for free, but in a refreshingly informal atmosphere. That, and the occasional opportunity to become a de facto ball boy. I know. I'm a freaking soccer geek.
-I know you haven’t forgotten, but there’s only ten days until First Kick 2009, and 19 days until WPS season opener. God, I love soccer geekdom!
Showing posts with label NOT FOR NOTHING. Show all posts
Showing posts with label NOT FOR NOTHING. Show all posts
Sunday, March 08, 2009
Monday, March 02, 2009
NOT FOR NOTHING, BUT...
MLS is begging for a star. Not a good player, not a great player, not a designated player.
A star. A player that transcends the sport. A colorful personality that is known for his on and off the field exploits, whether good or bad. Preferably good, of course.
The NFL has Tom Brady. The NBA has LeBron. MLB has, whether it likes it or not, Alex Rodriguez. And, of course, golf has this guy named Tiger. MLS has…?
No one.
Not even David Beckham. Yes, Becks transcends the soccer world by attending these glitzy Hollywood shindigs with Posh and TomKat, but it’s different with him. He’s English. He’s not American. He's not one of our own, so to speak. Brady, A-Rod, and LeBron are ours. American. Nevermind the fact that they make more money than we can ever imagine – they’re still one of us. They watch TV like us, eat hamburgers, and speak the same way we do. Becks? Not so much.
So who will step forward? Which American soccer player right here, in Major League Soccer, will give the league the avatar it needs to further establish itself here on our shores?
*Speaking of establishing itself, here’s hoping that Women’s Professional Soccer doesn’t adhere to the same model that MLS is currently following.
*For those wearing rose-colored shades: only eight days until Becks reports back to Galaxy camp!
*It’s March 1st, and up to 15 inches of snow is predicted to fall within the next 24 hours. Anyone still think MLS should adhere to the international schedule?
*I don’t care what anyone says, expansion is not what MLS should be doing right now, not after the commissioner – yes, commissioner – of the NFL just gave himself a 20% salary cut to save costs. The NFL. Cutting costs. Note MLS: Wake up.
*Among the preseason whispers this preseason is the sentiment that first overall pick Steve Zukuani, whose knock is that he shies away from contact, will not pan out in a physical league like MLS.
*Another preseason whisper is that Juan Carlos Osario has exactly half a season to prove that last season’s late run was not a fluke.
*Which, unfortunately for JCO, is exactly what it was.
*Houston may not see another MLS Cup championship for awhile.
*This week’s quiz: which former New Bedford Whaler missed participating in his club’s 1932 championship game while backstopping for the Boston Red Sox?
*By my unofficial count, I’ve already seen one more commercial for WPS than for MLS.
*Which means I’ve seen zero MLS commercials at all this year, not even the local Revolution broadcast spots.
*Just so you know, the Revolution are playing three preseason matches this year. Three as in one, two, three matches. Three as in 270* minutes of preseason fare.
(*Thank you, Ron.)
*And there’s not truth to the rumor that it’s only three because Steve Nicol says his players are still tired from last season’s schedule.
*Going into its third season of MLS, Toronto has a soccer spec stadium, wealth of season ticket holders, and now, it has bought – yes, bought – its very first player via transfer.
*Which begs the question: what the heck are other MLS clubs doing while this is taking place? Playing MLS Fantasy?
*In case you haven’t noticed by now, I’m rooting for WPS to succeed, if only to teach MLS how to run a professional soccer league successfully.
*Line of the Week this week is actually an entire training tip straight from Chicago Red Star’s Lindsay Tarpley, courtesy of ussoccer.com:
BRING A LOT OF SOCCER BALLS WHEN DOING FINISHING “This may sound silly, but the more balls you have the more repetition you can get without wasting time chasing balls. A lot of things I do only require one ball, but when I start hitting shots or crosses, the more soccer balls I have the better. If you are a young player, start collecting soccer balls now!”
*For the record, there are nine soccer balls sitting in my backyard. Still working on the finishing myself.
*From the Captain Obvious Files: Kobe Bryant, recently outfitted as a Barca player on the cover of ESPN the Magazine, should have MLS hitting up his agent for some potential Kobe-MLS promos.
*Paul Gardner suggests that the use of larger goals and extra points for goals scored would prevent soccer from falling into oblivion in the February 2009 issue of World Soccer.
*The funny thing is neither idea is really that original, or foreign. The USISL experimented with larger goals in 1995, and the NASL awarded extra points for goals back in the late-70s.
*Don’t forget to remember that while you’re shoveling another thick, 14-inch blanket of snow out of your driveway, that not only is First Kick 2009 20 days away, but that WPS’s inaugural match is only 29 days away as well. MLS and WPS: it warms your heart even when there’s 14 inches of snow on the ground.
A star. A player that transcends the sport. A colorful personality that is known for his on and off the field exploits, whether good or bad. Preferably good, of course.
The NFL has Tom Brady. The NBA has LeBron. MLB has, whether it likes it or not, Alex Rodriguez. And, of course, golf has this guy named Tiger. MLS has…?
No one.
Not even David Beckham. Yes, Becks transcends the soccer world by attending these glitzy Hollywood shindigs with Posh and TomKat, but it’s different with him. He’s English. He’s not American. He's not one of our own, so to speak. Brady, A-Rod, and LeBron are ours. American. Nevermind the fact that they make more money than we can ever imagine – they’re still one of us. They watch TV like us, eat hamburgers, and speak the same way we do. Becks? Not so much.
So who will step forward? Which American soccer player right here, in Major League Soccer, will give the league the avatar it needs to further establish itself here on our shores?
*Speaking of establishing itself, here’s hoping that Women’s Professional Soccer doesn’t adhere to the same model that MLS is currently following.
*For those wearing rose-colored shades: only eight days until Becks reports back to Galaxy camp!
*It’s March 1st, and up to 15 inches of snow is predicted to fall within the next 24 hours. Anyone still think MLS should adhere to the international schedule?
*I don’t care what anyone says, expansion is not what MLS should be doing right now, not after the commissioner – yes, commissioner – of the NFL just gave himself a 20% salary cut to save costs. The NFL. Cutting costs. Note MLS: Wake up.
*Among the preseason whispers this preseason is the sentiment that first overall pick Steve Zukuani, whose knock is that he shies away from contact, will not pan out in a physical league like MLS.
*Another preseason whisper is that Juan Carlos Osario has exactly half a season to prove that last season’s late run was not a fluke.
*Which, unfortunately for JCO, is exactly what it was.
*Houston may not see another MLS Cup championship for awhile.
*This week’s quiz: which former New Bedford Whaler missed participating in his club’s 1932 championship game while backstopping for the Boston Red Sox?
*By my unofficial count, I’ve already seen one more commercial for WPS than for MLS.
*Which means I’ve seen zero MLS commercials at all this year, not even the local Revolution broadcast spots.
*Just so you know, the Revolution are playing three preseason matches this year. Three as in one, two, three matches. Three as in 270* minutes of preseason fare.
(*Thank you, Ron.)
*And there’s not truth to the rumor that it’s only three because Steve Nicol says his players are still tired from last season’s schedule.
*Going into its third season of MLS, Toronto has a soccer spec stadium, wealth of season ticket holders, and now, it has bought – yes, bought – its very first player via transfer.
*Which begs the question: what the heck are other MLS clubs doing while this is taking place? Playing MLS Fantasy?
*In case you haven’t noticed by now, I’m rooting for WPS to succeed, if only to teach MLS how to run a professional soccer league successfully.
*Line of the Week this week is actually an entire training tip straight from Chicago Red Star’s Lindsay Tarpley, courtesy of ussoccer.com:
BRING A LOT OF SOCCER BALLS WHEN DOING FINISHING “This may sound silly, but the more balls you have the more repetition you can get without wasting time chasing balls. A lot of things I do only require one ball, but when I start hitting shots or crosses, the more soccer balls I have the better. If you are a young player, start collecting soccer balls now!”
*For the record, there are nine soccer balls sitting in my backyard. Still working on the finishing myself.
*From the Captain Obvious Files: Kobe Bryant, recently outfitted as a Barca player on the cover of ESPN the Magazine, should have MLS hitting up his agent for some potential Kobe-MLS promos.
*Paul Gardner suggests that the use of larger goals and extra points for goals scored would prevent soccer from falling into oblivion in the February 2009 issue of World Soccer.
*The funny thing is neither idea is really that original, or foreign. The USISL experimented with larger goals in 1995, and the NASL awarded extra points for goals back in the late-70s.
*Don’t forget to remember that while you’re shoveling another thick, 14-inch blanket of snow out of your driveway, that not only is First Kick 2009 20 days away, but that WPS’s inaugural match is only 29 days away as well. MLS and WPS: it warms your heart even when there’s 14 inches of snow on the ground.
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