It's Almost 2008 Rant

So I was at the local supermarket today, and while waiting in line for the requested deli meats at the delicatessen, I sampled what appeared to be a Nilla Wafer topped with a mocha-chocolate chip dip. It was delicious.

With the ball dropping just over 24 hours, I suppose it's time to lean back in the rocking chair, bind my hands together, and reflect upon the soon-to-expire 2007.

*Of all of my undertakings this year, my most rewarding one was unquestionably my Soccer Odyssey, and I knew it would be. As a soccer junkie, I lovingly embraced the idea of scouting new places to watch, breathe, and ultimately, finding myself in my element. Although I didn't make to all of the venues I had originally planned on, I was able to rest my weary bones and recline at the following locations:

India Point Park (Providence, RI)
Gano Street Park (Providence, RI)
Stevenson Field (Providence, RI)
National Soccer Hall of Fame (Oneonta, NY)
Pierce Field (East Providence, RI)
RIC Soccer Field (Providence, RI)
Gillette Stadium (Foxboro, MA)
Navy-Marine Corps Memorial Stadium (Annapolis, MD)
Westside Athletic Complex (Danbury, CT)
RFK Stadium (Washington, DC)
Bryant University Track and Turf Complex (Lincoln, RI)
Rentscheler Field (Hartford, CT)


The typical mortal would say "egads, I'm exhausted." Not at all. If there were a match going on right now, in the dead of a punishing New England winter, I would bring a cannister of hot cocoa, and take my place at the top rung of the brutally cold metal bleachers for the entire ninety while my extremities endure the accompanying frostbite. I'm crazier about this game than Tom Cruise is about Scientology.

*Most memorable match: Little to no inner debate on this one. Hands down, it had to have been the WestConn-RIC Little East semi-final women's soccer match at Western Connecticut State University. Aside from the emotional attachment to my alma mater, the fourth-seeded Anchorwomen provided their own "Rudy" story when they stepped out onto the pitch with only two subs available against the perennial Little East powerhouse. Overmatched? Not on this night.

Although WestConn had beaten them to the scoreboard in the first half, the Anchorwomen responded with two goals of their own going into the 85th minute with victory in their sights. But a questionable call on the right channel of RIC territory led to WestConn's equalizer off the ensuring CK, tying the proceedings at two apiece. An exhausted RIC side braved through nearly 14 minutes of OT before they watched WestConn clinch the game-winner after 104 total minutes, with RIC giving it their absolute all to upset their opponents.

*Toughest match to watch: Revolution-DC on August 5th. I don't know if it was because of the heat, or partying like rock stars the night before, but the Revs were flatter than Paris Hilton. Nothing was working, and when it wasn't working, DC's Luciano Emilio made them pay, with two goals en route to his club's 3-0 victory. Perhaps the most disheartening aspect of the loss was the fact that the Revs, who had stood atop the Eastern Conference pinnacle for most of the season, we simply outclassed for the first time all summer. It was not pretty.

*Most impressive players: Jeffrey Gonsalves (Rhode Island Stingrays) and Kerry Donahue (Rhode Island College).

After a disappointing spring in which he was drafted by his hometown Toronto FC side, the former Rhody Ram was soon out of a job when injuries limited him in preseason training. So when he returned to RI to finish off his studies at URI, he also came back to his former PDL side and dominated. Ten goals, five assists in 14 games for the 'Rays left little doubt that Gonsalves has got the stuff to play professionally.

Donahue, a senior defender at RIC, was already known for her stellar play in the back with an all-conference selection in 2006. But she turned her game up another notch by scoring three goals, including a start at forward. Yet, her best match yet came when during the final match of her collegiate career against WestConn, where she absolutely shut down the lethal WestConn attack. It's said that the best players save their best when the stakes are at their highest, and Donahue proved this saying true, as she finished off her career with an exemplary performance in CT.

You're probably wondering why I started off this piece with my supermarket experience. Well, the Nilla Wafer is a metaphor (literally and figuratively) for this year. Like many of the matches I attended, they were new to me, there for the taking, completely free. After tasting the cookies with its delicate topping, I came away from it wanting more, much like all of the soccer I saw this year.

Hey, what where you throw those tomatoes!

Happy New Year everybody!

Rays lose 1-0 heartbreaker to Crusaders

Under overcast and misty skies, the Rhode Island Stingrays dropped their final home match of the 2007 season to the Cape Cod Crusaders Wednesday night, losing in heartbreaking fashion on a Dwight Barnett header in the 68th minute.

The match, played at the Stingrays home away from home, Bryant University in Smithfield, RI, pitted the PDL rivals on a fast artificial surface made even quicker by the misty conditions engulfing the region.

Early on, it was clear that the Crusaders looked to acquire goal number one, as they set their offensive tempo rather quickly, forcing the Rays defenders to keep the potent offense (30 goals all season) at bay in the opening minutes.

The Crusaders delivered their first threatening shot in the 10th minute, when Dan Stratford, who hounded the Rays back line all night, went one-on-one down the right flank with defender Derek Puerta before deflecting a shot that Rays keeper Josh Ford harnessed for the stop.

As the Cape Cod kept the home club on its toes, the Rays managed to find daylight of their own in the 25th minute. Marlon Giraldo took a dangerous free kick from 25 yards out, and rocketed the ball mere inches above the crossbar. Though the shot missed, it put the Crusaders on notice that the Rays were not content with simply stifling their attack.

Another chance developed in the 36th minute on a Stingray counterattack, as Giraldo sidestepped his defender, and launched a missile on Crusader keeper James Thorpe, who dismantled the heat-seeker.

With the final seconds of the first half ticking away, the Crusaders feverishly counterattacked in the 45th minute, when the menacing Stratford sailed a free kick to Barnett, who wildly headed the ball wide of the intended target, as the half expired soon thereafter.

After the second half kicked off, the Rays continued their stellar defense by stifling an attack that nearly counterattacked at will. Cape Cod wasted no time in reclaiming the attack less than two minutes in, as Stratford delivered a dangerous cross from the left that forced Ford airborne to intercept the pass.

The slick surface continued to wreak havoc in early minutes of the second frame, as the ball unnaturally skipped and slid along the multi-lined, all-purpose turf at Bryant University Stadium.

A promising chance materialized in the 54th minute, when the Rays forcefully reclaimed possession on a clever steal by Jeff Gonsalves off a developing Crusader counterattack. The striker then proceeded down the right wing, before sending in a beautiful cross to an open Lukasz Tumicz, who side-volleyed a screamer over the crossbar.

The clubs traded possessions thereafter until the fateful 68th minute. Stratford took a free kick and delivered a fantastic bending ball into the mixer. Amid the rush of players crashing the box, Barnett rose to the occasion, and powerfully headed the pass into the back of the net, giving the Crusaders the all-important first goal.

Attempting to kick start the attack again, the Rays reassembled the troops down the pitch in the 72nd minute kick started by defender John Nolan. He blazed right into the teeth of the Cape Cod back line before sending a feed to Gonsalves, who fired a wild shot well wide of the net.

After a frustrating night of near-misses, the Rays launched one more push toward net in the 89th minute. From the left edge of the box, Giraldo swept a slick, devilishly skipping grounder that met its untimely demise in the mitts of Thorpe, thus snuffing out the last chance at finding the equalizer.

Gonsalves performs the hat trick in 4-2 demolition of Long Island

Despite the calendar indicating a twenty-four hour period of unluckiness, Friday the 13th proved to be a wildly lucky day for Stingray striker Jeff Gonsalves. The former URI Ram played without curse or hijinx, as he netted an astounding three goals for the Rays in a resounding 4-2 victory over Long Island last night.

Gonsalves first took residence in Long Island territory in the 7th minute, when he raced right into the heart of the Long Island back line and launched a rocket that deflected off a hapless Rider defender before the box. Despite the slight redirection, ball arched perfectly into the upper right shelf for the opening salvo, and gave the home side the early one-goal advantage.

Soon after, a scary scene occurred at the 8th minute mark, when Riders midfielder Paul Roderick galloped into goalkeeper Joshua Ford, which left the Stingray down for a few tense moments before he came back to his feet.

However, a few minutes later, Ford was immediately tested, and made beautiful stop on a Rider shot that left him vulnerable on the rebound. Said rebound found the foot of Roderick, who rifled the shot from the right flank for the equalizer in the 11th minute.

As the game drew toward the halfway point of the first half, tempers on both sides flared, as Rays midfielder Jonathan Pereira was awarded a yellow card by referee Guido Gonzalez for a questionable violation. Soon after, the Riders began to unleash a flurry of rather unsportsmanlike shots at various Stingray players, which drew the ire of a visibly upset Mario Pereira.

The school of hard knocks continued for the remainder of the frame, as both club’s players traded more late tackles and high elbows than offensive chances.

As the first frame neared conclusion, the Riders looked to be taking the offensive advantage, as the Rays began to find themselves in reverse more than drive .Then, in the 44th minute, the Stingrays quickly counterattacked, as Dawid Badecki fed a gluttonous Gonsalves, who beautifully samba’ed through the right flank, cut inside, and took an impossibly-angled shot on goal that magically found a home in the top left shelf of the net for the go-ahead goal minutes before the curtain fell on the first half.

When the second half kicked off, the Riders sought to locate the equalizer and wasted no time in doings so. Two minutes into Act Two Mike Grella took a fortuitous rebound off the far post and tapped in the easy goal at the edge of the goal mouth in the 47th minute.

Just after the hour mark, the Rays broke through the Rider back line when Badecki delivered a perfect ball on net that was batted away by Riders keeper Jason Landers, but the sequence turned out empty handed, as the both club battled at midfielder for most of the second half.
Tempers went wild again in the 72nd minute, when Gonzalez gave Rider coach Dave Fisher an untimely ejection, after the manager continued to hurl disparaging comments regarding the quality of the officiating.

With the score level, it was the Riders that found themselves in better position to attain the go-ahead score. However, a black cat must have been lurking near the Long Island bench when, in the 77th minute, Grella went one on one with Rays defender Darren Howerton deep into the Stingray box, before the shifty midfielder sidestepped Howerton, paused, and launched a clear shot on goal that flailed high over the crossbar. Less than a minute later, Grella, in a reprisal of his recent performance, once again crashed the box, and yet again faked out his defender, before firing a shot that unluckily went off the back heel of an oblivious John Nolan, who was simply marking his man before the goal mouth.

Then, with less than ten minutes remaining in regular time, Marlon Giraldo found Evan Unger in wide open pasture. Unger took two touches, and launched a hard shot on net deflected wide of the Rider net. On the ensuing corner kick, the ball was headed by Ryan McCormick tantalizingly close to the goal before Gonsalves followed up with another header and directed it past Landers for the go-ahead in the 83rdminute.

Uncontent with a one-goal advantage, an-all out Stingray assault culminated on a McCormick screamer from the right flank in the 86th minute, which gave the Rays the insurance goal with time quickly dwindling.

As the leaderless Riders struggled to re-assemble their attack in the slim hopes of closing the two-goal gap, the Rays stonewalled the flailing Long Island attack, and the home club preserved the much-needed 4-2 victory on home soil.

Stingrays draw even to Fury, 1-1

Like a pair of mixed martial arts fighters, the Rhode Island Stingrays and Ottawa Fury punched, kicked and grappled their way to a 1-1 draw Sunday afternoon at Pierce Memorial Field before an enthusiastic ringside crowd.

The Fury kicked off for the first half under cloudy skies and cool temperatures, as both teams attempted to find their pace in the opening minutes. Both teams struggled to muster any quality chances until the 8th minute, when Jeff Gonsalves crashed the box but narrowly missed net, hitting the side of the goal as the ball harmlessly bounced out of play.

As both clubs continued to scratch and claw at each other, it wasn’t until the 13th minute that Rays midfielder Lukasz Tumicz charged down the Fury end of the field before unleashing a speculative shot that went well over the Fury net.

Less than a minute later, Peter Wise effectively ended dangerous Fury sequence when he stopped a Phil Amahazion point blank shot in the box, keeping the score 0-0.

The Rays caught the Fury completely off guard in the 19th, when Gonsalves streaked down the left flank with nothing but wide open real estate ahead and sent the ball toward a hard charging Tumicz on the right, who took the pass and drew the lone Fury defender before he crossed it right back to his teammate for the easy goal. 1-0, and the Rays took control.

The goal sparked the Rays attack, and they dominated possession in the following minutes, while Ottawa defenders charged and chased the ball all in vain for a large chunk of the first half.

In the 32nd minute, Danleigh Borman crossed a beautiful ball from the left to a sliding Gonsalves, who narrowly missed the connection, as the ball sailed inches away from the threatening boot of the former Toronto FC prospect.

As the Rays kicked off for the second frame, Ottawa came out attacking like the proverbial bat out of hell before the patient Rays dense neutralized the rather sloppy attack in the opening minutes. The Rays proceeded to launch counterattacks almost at will, as the Fury attack often disintegrated before the ball even reached the box.

In the 50th minute, Borman flicked a well-placed pass to Jeff Cameron, who broke down the left flank toward the Fury goal and cracked a shot that clanked off the right post.

The Rays continued to stymie the Ottawa defense, and the only answer provided to the patient and methodical attack was undisciplined aggression that displayed Ottawa’s unorganized defending tactics, leading to numerous fouls and three yellow cards issued before the 60 minute mark.

Quality scoring bids for the Fury were kept to minimum for most of the match until
the 85th minute, when an Ottawa corner kick flew into the box, prompting Wise to make an attempt at the ball. However, he was caught out of position and fell to the ground, as three Fury attackers battled for the loose ball before Fury forward William Beauge easily tapped the equalizer into the net with less than ten minutes left to play.

Any hope for the Rays to attain the game-winner came a minute into extra time, when midfielder Alonso Villasenor sent an immaculate feed to a gate-crashing Gonsalves before the striker knocked home the apparent go-ahead goal. But soon after celebrations commenced, the referee’s assistant waved his flag offside, thus stifling the last true chance the blue and gold had at earning three points at home, as the match ended in a 1-1 draw.

Gonsalves looks to latch on in MLS

Eighteen goals during any soccer season, on any level -recreational, amateur, or pro- is impressive. It was certainly impressive enough for Jeffrey Gonsalves to earn NCAA Third Team All- American honors in 2006, after leading the University of Rhode Island men's team to the NCAA tournament last fall.

After his remarkable year, the native of Markham, Ontario was rated by MLS SuperDraft guru, Buzz Carrick, as one of the best collegiate forwards in the country. Toronto FC, the expansion MLS team located in his home country, took notice and drafted the Rhody Ram with the 40th overall pick in this winter's SuperDraft.“When I first got drafted, it was exciting because it was the hometown team and it was a chance to play as a professional,” said Gonsalves.

But, before he could even sport the Toronto kit before a true home crowd, it all came to a screeching halt.

Gonsalves pulled his hamstring early on in Toronto's preseason camp, and due to his prolonged convalescence, was never truly given the opportunity to flash the raw ability that aided him in his goal-scoring adventures in 2006.

“I went down there and got injured, and things didn’t work out,” said Gonsalves. Toronto subsequently released him without ever being to gauge the hometown prospect's true MLS potential. “Now I’m back with RI.”

Today, Gonsalves plays mere minutes away from his alma mater as a forward for Rhode Island Stingrays (PDL), a club he honed his skills with last year, prior to his breakthrough colleague campaign. He played in seven matches for the Rays in 2006, and tallied a team-leading four assists, as well as a goal, for the blue and gold. Through four games this season, he has already recorded a goal, but more importantly, he has played in every minute of every Rays’ match thus far.

Although one would think that the former All-American is better served playing in a more competitive league, Gonsalves has benefited from playing with a familiar group of players from last year in his attempt to get back to MLS.

“Yeah, as well as playing with some of the players with at URI (who also play for the Stingrays). It’s almost like being back at school (playing) with most of these guys. It’s really not much of a change, it’s almost like a homecoming almost. So it’s been pretty good.”

Additionally, Gonsalves came back to Rhode Island to earn something more valuable than just minutes on the pitch: earlier this month, he graduated from URI.

Nevertheless, the goal for Gonsalves is to find his way back into MLS - a goal he is hoping to achieve by refining his goal-scoring skills with the Rays in the meantime. The close geographical proximity of the Stingrays to the New England Revolution - a mere 25 miles- has Gonsalves hoping to catch the eye of Revolution manager Steve Nicol.Working in Gonsalves favor is that the system which Rays manager Mario Pereira employs - the 3-5-2 – is the same system used by Nicol with his Revs.

Although the MLS squad already has a plethora of young talent on its developmental roster, a strong performance during a reserve match guest appearance or tryout could certainly open some eyes among a coaching squad that has a proven track record of developing talented young players.

Yet, the former All-American is ready to showcase his talents on any professional stage, and hopes that his play for the Rays this season attracts the attention of scouts and opens the door to some playing opportunities, stateside or abroad.

“Hopefully (there will be opportunities) either in North America or overseas. I’m not entirely sure. I’ll see what happens.”

Sunday Morning Striker: EJ burns Revs, 4-3

Hope you’ve had an enjoyable Memorial Day weekend so far! SMS was busy attending a whopping total of five soccer matches during the extended break from the office. Luckily, all of the matches were exciting, which left SMS temporarily distracted from the reality that this season of American Idol is now over and that he just forked over $42 to fill up at the pump.

What a game that was last week - a splendid rematch of the 2006 MLS Cup final! Unfortunately, SMS was precluded from viewing the 1-0 cold dish served to the Creamsicles, as Cox Communications does not carry Fox Soccer Channel in Rhode Island. Nevertheless, SMS was quite entertained by actual live soccer taking the place 1.25 miles west from casa de la SMS over at Pierce Field, the home of the Rhode Island Stingrays of the Premier Development League.

The match, a stunning display of pure domination to the tune of 4-0 over the Vermont Voltage, featured two former MLSers who made news this past winter. Miguel Fortes, a.k.a. Rui Fortes of preseason LA Galaxy tryout fame, and Jeffrey Gonsalves, drafted by Toronto FC in SuperDraft, both had their hands in Stingray goals on the cool and damp Saturday night. SMS highly recommends taking the kids and wife over to Pierce Field this summer to catch the ‘Rays, for an entertaining (and frugal!) night of soccer.

SMS was also quite entertained with the Ireland-Bolivia under card match prior to the Revs-Wizards main event on Saturday. While some may surmise that SMS was strongly pro-Ireland due to SMS’s pro-Irish moniker, he was very enthusiastic about watching the South American soccer that Paul Gardner regularly touts as truly entertaining and free spirited futbol.

Of course, one of the most sobering aspects of international matches is the heightened threat level that accompanies them whenever two countries’ sides hit the pitch. Sobering indeed when you are greeted by bomb-sniffing dogs and military personnel at what’s supposed to be a diversion from the troubles of real life.

Anyway, the match itself ranked high on SMS’s entertainment scale, which is no small feat nowadays. With Real World Denver now over, and only two more episodes of The Shield before the current season ends, SMS will sure be experiencing withdrawal pains in between live soccer matches of the Revolution and Stingray variety.

Back to soccer: the Irish scored the opening goal in the 13th minute, when Shane Long crashed the Bolivian goal, giving the “home” team the early 1-0 lead. However, the Bolivians quickly licked their wounds and fired a goal of their own less than two minutes later when Miguel Hoyos found himself on an island in front of the Irish goal, and launched a no-doubter past a helpless Nicky Colgan for the equalizer in the 14th.

In the second half, SMS wandered away from the sterile confines of the Gillette Stadium press box and assimilated himself into the crowd to catch the rest of the match (and work on his tan in the process.) The crowd was remarkably spirited and enthusiastic, with some colorful incidents (four fans in Section 117 getting unceremoniously taken away in handcuffs after causing some spectator raucous) and comments (“You know why Ireland can’t get another goal? It’s because they’re not used to the sun”).

The last 45 minutes transpired like that of an M. Night Shyamalan flick – a dramatic, almost eerie episode of soccer that made you feel like something was bound to be lurking just around the corner. Both squads constantly threatened each other with potential go-ahead scores early in the second half, but none ever found the back of the net. Although the match ended in an apparent “oh honey, it’s another one of those boring soccer ties” on paper, the game was perhaps the most thrilling 1-1 tie SMS has ever witnessed in his brief soccer journalism career.

After that appealing first match, the Revs-Wizard main card bout kicked off on absolute gem of an evening that featured hazy skies and unseasonably warm temps, enough to crack open the window in the press box. SMS had concerns that the newly-sodded (yes, as in the natural stuff) Gillette Satdium pitch could pose a problem after Ireland-Bolivia concluding less than 45 minutes prior. How would the turf hold up? SMS was anxious; for the gods had smiled upon the club for so long that the fear of potential injury to a Revolution player was certainly running amok on the mind.

As SMS peered onto the now-completely shaded field, the bright boots of Taylor Twellman shone through the shadows. Given this development, SMS was confident in a victory for the local XI.

Curiously, there was no national anthem prior to this match, but SMS supposes this was covered prior to the international match. At 6:37pm ET, Kansas City kicked off to begin the match, and the ball resided in the Revolution in the opening minutes, as the Revs failed to march down the KC end with any effectiveness

That all changed at 6:48pm ET, when Andy Dorman raced down the middle and passed to a crashing Steve Ralston, whose shot was initially rejected by Wizards keeper Kevin Hartmann, before Ralston cleaned up the rebound, reloaded, and fired past a helpless Hartmann, for the early 1-0 lead at the 11th minute mark.

In the 18th, Dorman laced a shot from the right wing, before it was hauled in by Hartmann, thus neutralizing the potential Revolution march. Soon after, in the 19th, an attacking Eddie Johnson cradled the ball, and right before he managed a shot, Jeff Larentowicz pulled on EJ’s jersey, leading to a dangerous free kick. The kick was humorously blocked Jay Heaps, who broke away from the Revolution wall in the direction of the point blank rocket, earning hearty praise from the home crowd.

While KC managed to re-establish itself in Revolution territory, the Revs back line did well to stifle any Wizardry on its real estate.

With SMS’s cell phone reading 7:11pm ET, Taylor Twellman raced down the heart of the Kansas City end in wide open space before he sidestepped defender Aaron Hohlbein and smoked a shot that deflected off his victim and past a startled Hartmann in the 23rd minute. 2-0 Revs.

Undeterred - inspired if anything - by the whole Revolution goal-scoring spectacle, the Wizards countered right back when Davy Arnaud dusted off Shalrie Joseph down the middle for the first goal for the Wizards in the 25th minute at 7:14pm ET. 2-1 Revs.

Not content to rest on its laurels for too long, the Wizards scored the equalizer in the 26th minute, when EJ took a lobbed feed from Jack Jewsbury and put the ball past Matt Reis.

Three goals in three minutes, and SMS feverishly typed away, trying to keep up with the action. At 2-2, it appeared to be anybody’s match to the casual bystander. However, it became clear to even the blindest of men that the momentum had clearly been harnessed by the road club. The helium in the Revolution blimp riding high after Twellman’s goal was effectively forced out by the sharp darts of Wizard goals.

This is when good teams – teams at the top of the Eastern Conference standings – have their mettle tested. How would the Revs respond to such a crushing sequence?

In the 33rd minute, Ralston took a corner that found the noggin of Pat Noonan, but sailed well away from the KC goal. Despite this chance, the Revs looked clearly deflated, and struggled to mount the same pressure that had led to their previous scores.

In the 38th, EJ flashed the speed and ball skills that had SL Benfica (Portuguese Liga) drooling all over him to the tune of a five million dollar transfer bid two years ago. As the sun was setting in the distance, he took a ball on the left corner of the box, before racing parallel to the net and firing a groundhog past Reis for the go-ahead goal for the Wizards. 3-2, Wizards, and SMS to scribbled “amazing” into his notebook after watching EJ’s brilliant goal.

At the 43rd minute mark, the Revs reorganized their attack, intent on attaining the equalizer. Khano Smith sent in a beautiful cross from the left wing to Twellman, who nodded it just right of the goal for a late-half bid to even the score before the closing bell of the first frame. The Revs continued to muster their attack in stoppage time before it ultimately fizzled out, leaving the first place club staring straight at a one-goal deficit as time expired on the first half.

Perhaps the most accurate assessment of the match thus far was when SMS overheard a comment that the game was “a vanilla match punctuated by a gaggle of goals.”

What did the second half promise for a clearly dejected home club? As SMS pondered the question, he took to the cookies spread and munched on some oatmeal cookies – hopefully, not failure cookies. Readers, SMS ate free cookies and drank fountain soda to bring you this highly-detailed account of the match!

As the second half kicked off, SMS was ready to see what kind of fire Nicol sparked under his club’s collective rear during the halftime interval.

In the 55th minute, the Revs were awarded a free kick after Jay Heaps as fouled as he attempted to crash the net. The kick, taken by Smith, from just outside the right side of the box, was launched an absolute mallard out of the reach of any Revs player under twenty feet tall.

The Revs threatened again in the 59th, when Joseph battled Jewsbury just before the box, before the Wizard defender pulled down the Grenadian. The Revs were subsequently granted a free kick from just above the box. Ralston cracked the free kick, which clanked right off the right corner of the goal, as the Wizards surely must have sighed in relief.

In the 64th, Adam Cristman, who had also just come into match, was fouled, giving another free kick in an opportune part of the field. Ralston launched a gorgeous ball to an airborne Twellman, who headed the ball just above the crossbar.

In the 69th minute, at 8:03pm ET, Joseph penetrated the box and kicked a shot that was deflected off the KC defender’s hand, leading to a penalty kick. Joseph took the kick himself, and duly sent in the equalizer, giving the Revs a well-deserved goal after constant pressure in the KC end. The gods typically reward these efforts, and must have smiled on the efforts of the navy and red.

However, the Wizards did not buckle. Amazingly, the goal must have inspired the KC offense, and they began to pressure the Revs end of the field.

Said pressure came to a climax in the 82nd minute when, in a bid for his third goal of the game, EJ streaked down the heart of the field past James Riley and Matt Reis and put the ball in the corner of the Revolution net. 4-3, Wizards, and the speedy striker notched his first hat trick of his MLS career.

Yet, the Revs did not go down quietly. In the 84th, Twellman attacked with a surface-to-air missile targeted for the upper right shelf before it was intercepted by the left paw of Kevin Hartman, snuffing out the Revs their best chance to equalize in the expiring minutes of the match. The Revs aggressively converged upon the Wizards like a gaggle of paparazzi at a Lindsay Lohan party, hoping the gods would smile upon them as they had for the majority of the season.

With three minutes of stoppage time, the Revs had their work cut out for them in order to acquire the elusive equalizer. One last chance on a free kick from the right wing, but the ball sailed out of harm’s way, and the Revs dropped their first match in 48 days, 4-3 to the club from KC.

Stat of the Match Part 1: According to the post-match Ireland-Boliva press release, exactly 00,000 attended the 1-1 international thriller. Coincidentally, the exact same number of people also voted that the tie-breaker be resolved by a live cock fight at center-circle.

Stat of the Match Part 2: Two Missouri natives lead the Revs in goals scored against Kansas City: Both Pat Noonan (St. Louis) Taylor Twellman (St. Louis) have each scored four goals career against the Wizards.

Stat of the Match Part 3: The Revs haven’t beaten the Wizards at home this millennium. Their last win over KC was back on September 7, 1999.

Stat of the Match Part 4: Saturday night’s game marked the first time Matt Reis gave up four goals since last year’s 4-0 loss at FC Dallas on May 20th.

Stat of the Match Part 5: Three goals were scored in a four minute span during the first half (Twellman 23’, Arnaud 25’, Johnson 26’). SMS hasn’t seen scoring like that since Matt Dillon’s Oscar-worthy performance in Wild Things.

Hidden Indicator of the Match: Two Revs players from Missouri scored goals against their home state’s MLS club. This is the kind of hidden indicator that is essential to an insider’s understanding of the game. Fortunately, we all know what this means: Ralston and Twellman are two of the club’s best players.

“MLS Hates the Revs” Conspiracy Update: In recent years, the rhetoric regarding the Revs tough luck when it comes to national TV coverage, scheduling (see: first half of 2006 season), unscrupulous officiating toward a certain Grenadian, and other unfortunate events have led some fans to decry that “MLS Hates the Revs.” Given all this, it’s theoretically possible that, if MLS had accepted SL Benfica’s $5 million transfer bid for EJ back in 2005, the Revs would have won handily, 3-1, Saturday night. Wow! I guess MLS really does hate the Revs!

Revs Reserves Update: SMS is happy to report that recent Revolution rookie addition Kyle Helton has speed to burn, and said stealth was on display before a handful of spectators on Sunday morning. During one fantastic sequence in the first half, Helton pick pocketed a Wizard defender and flicked the switch on the afterburners down the right flank, before sending a perfect ball to Chris Loftus, who diverted the ball into the back of the net. By far, one of the sweetest sequences SMS has seen in Reserve Division competition.

Stingrays Update: Through the miracle of seven consecutive green lights and a DOHC V-Tech engine, SMS was able to catch the final 15 minutes of the Stingrays-Admirals PDL tilt, thus giving SMS the uncanny distinction of attending three matches in the span of less than five hours.

Inflated ego aside, the remainder of the match had the Rays on full-bore attack, as the Admirals just barely escaped with a win at Pierce Field. Reportedly, Peter Squeglia scored the sinister goal for Albany in the 11th, leading the Rays to their third loss of the season.

US Women’s National Team Feature: The heir apparent to legendary WNT keeper Briana Scurry, Hope Solo has performed remarkably well during the past two seasons, including a ridiculous 1,054 minute goal-less streak set back in 2006. Additionally, she had a particularly impressive Four Nations tourney back in January, in which she was named Best Goalkeeper after allowing only one goal. Nevertheless, trying to fill the shoes of Scurry is a monumental task - a task that Solo has proven she can undertake.

Join us again after the Revs-Real Salt Lake match, as the home club hopes to rebound from Saturday night’s home loss – and what better team to do it against! Real has yet to win this season, which means SMS predicts a convincing home victory come the night of June 2nd. SMS guarantees the accuracy of all predictions - or the next one’s free!

Rays blank Volts, 4-0

The Rhode Island Stingrays exploded for four goals during their victory versus divisional rival Vermont Voltage on Saturday night, in a PDL match up that pitted two teams each searching for their first win of the 2007 season.

Early on, the Stingrays set the tempo by stringing precise passing sequences that thoroughly frustrated the Volts for much of the match.

Just how frustrated the Volts became with the passing clinic exhibited by the Rays was exemplified in the 27th minute, when James McCarron hard tackled Jonathan Pereira from behind, earning the Volt midfielder a red card and subsequent ejection.

Forced to play a man down, the Volts had their hands full with a Stingray attack that took advantage and dominated with several scoring opportunities soon after.

However, it wasn’t until the 44th minute that the Rays were able to put a point on the board. On a sudden break toward goal, Pereira sent a quick feed to Lukasz Tumicz, who streaked down the right flank before unleashing a scorching shot past Volt goalkeeper Steve Hennessey that gave the Rays the 1-0 advantage before the end of the half.

It was an uphill battle for the Volts to keep the Rays at bay in the second half. Volt manager Bo Vuckovic tried his best to hedge the potent Rays attack with fresh-legged substitutes.

Nonetheless, the Volts only had their backs pressed further to the wall in the 50th minute, when Marlon Giraldo aimed and fired shot from 25 yards out that ricocheted off the crossbar, momentarily depriving the home side of goal number two.

Another opportunity materialized in the 55th minute, when Jeffrey Gonsalves crashed through an exasperated Volt defense and flicked a quick shot into the back of the net, giving the home side their second goal of the game.

Minutes later, in the 58th minute, Jimmy Hernandez raced down the right flank before sending in a looping cross to a wide open Giraldo, who sat comfortably at the top of the box completely unmarked. After clinking the crossbar minutes earlier, Giraldo did not miss this time around, as he took a touch and fired the shot into the Voltage goal for the 3-0 lead.

The Rays continued their relentless siege of the Voltage end of the field, and continually poked and prodded through a back line that had been dismantled by an aggressive attack.

During the 72nd minute, Rays manager Mario Pereira made an unorthodox goalkeeper substitution when he replaced Joshua Ford with Peter Wise. Yet, the unconventional swap would pay dividends later on in the closing minutes.

As if to reward the home crowd for braving through the damp and cold conditions, the Rays capped off their goal scoring exhibition in the 76th minute, when Tumicz planted himself in the box and spun two defenders before cracking shot into the upper reaches of the Voltage goal for his second goal of the game, and the 4-0 lead for the Rays.

With the Rays clutching to the shutout during the waning minutes of the match, the Volts were awarded a penalty kick in the 83rd minute after some aggressive tackling on the part of the Rays defenders.

After electing to take the kick, Volt forward Matt Stedman launched the dead ball to the left of Wise, who soared to make an incredible two-handed stop on the point-blank missile, thus preserving the 4-0 shutout win for the home team.